To My 25-Year-Old Self
I know that age is just a number. Depending on the day, I can feel anywhere from 18 to 80 — but turning 50 has me feeling more feels than usual. It’s brought up all kinds of memories and got me nostalgic enough that I went through my old photo albums and stopped when I found pictures of myself just after my 25th birthday. The photos were easy to identify because one month after I turned 25… I got married.
I kept going back to this one picture of myself at my rehearsal dinner. I was sitting at the head table, wearing a cream-colored suit dress, and drinking Coors Light right out of the bottle.
I felt endeared to the girl in that picture. I wanted to sit next to her, maybe even open a bottle of Coors Light, and hear what she had to say.
More than anything though, I wondered what I would tell her if given the chance. I can still see myself in her eyes and smile… but there is so much more that I know today. 25 years later. 25 years… they went by so fast.
So, I decided to write a letter to that girl in the photo — to my 25-year-old self.
This is what I said:
You are at the beginning of such a beautiful journey. There will be unbelievable highs and devastating lows. I wish I could protect you from the latter, but it’s a package deal and the only way I’ve found to ever truly grow.
Don’t be afraid to take risks. Don’t shy away from change when you know in your heart it’s for the best. Staying where you are doesn’t do anyone any favors if it’s time to go. Remember that at the end of your marriage, when you move to California and leave a great job to start your own company.
You are braver than you know. The day you realize that you built the life of your dreams by taking leaps, is the day you start believing in magic.
Don’t hold back from anything, ever. Let life have its way with you. Get messy. Make mistakes. Share yourself. All the sides. Tell the truth in a loving, intentional, non-ego way. Don’t be a victim. Don’t be a hero. Just show up as you. Every second of every day.
Trust, trust, trust. You are so crazy safe. And exactly where you are supposed to be right now, yesterday and tomorrow.
Dream big. Love bigger. Cry hard. Laugh louder. Give more. Eat better.
Exercise, journal, practice gratitude, meditate and spend as much time as you can in nature. It’s the fastest way I’ve learned to figure your stuff out.
Listen to your heart. Trust the breadcrumbs. Stop waiting until it’s perfect. If it feels good in your bones, it’s right, even if it scares the sh*t out of you.
If you’d do it for free, make it your career and you’ll never work a day in your life. Try as many jobs as it takes until you find the one that feels right. You’re going to keep changing and evolving. That means updating your career. It’s okay to have more than one… or two… or three. It’s never too late and it’s always possible.
Remember that everyone is on their own path. Be kind to them and don’t judge. You’ll always have enough stuff to clean up on your own sidewalk. Stop looking at everyone else’s and just send them love. We’re all different and we’re all the same. At any given moment, everyone is doing the best they can.
Let relationships come and go — friendships, romances, anything. People won’t always stay in your life, but the imprint they make on your heart is forever. That’s what counts.
When someone dies, look for the signs that they sprinkle on your path to let you know that they’re still with you and cheering you on from a much comfier seat.
Only see the good stuff when you look in the mirror. It’s all that’s ever really there. Just by being alive, the world is offering you the dance of a lifetime.
No matter where you go, the challenges you face, the leaps you take, and the crazy decisions you make, I’ll be waiting just a little farther down the road … happy, fulfilled, and oh so grateful that you never gave up and you never gave in.
